These are the 20 articles of the constitution of Qootärlænt as it was by December 2008:
1 Everyone is free, free to vote, free to give his own opinion. Everyone is also free to give himself a nickname and everyone is free to breath, to eat and to drink(if they can effort it).
2 a. No one may be criminal AND show this in public together.
b. No one may hate The Emperor and show this in public
c. No one is allowed to make fun of 'The Constitution' in public
3 Everybody is entitled to receive one percent of the by him payed taxes back(therefore remember how much thou hast payed).
4 Everybody is allowed to make an extra donation of any possible size to The Emperor and/or The Empire.
5 Everybody may receive a royal title(like duke of waist disposal).
6 a. Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD God in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.
b. Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy.
Six days shalt thou labour, and do all thy work: But the seventh day is the sabbath
c. Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.
d. Thou shalt not kill.
e. Thou shalt not commit adultery.
f. Thou shalt not steal.
g. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour.
h. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour's.
7 Everybody may sleep anywhere were ye can see the stars, except from were the star called 'The Emperor' is seen.
8 Everybody must know The Chorus of The National Anthem and must be able to pronounce it.
9 All the Articles in this Constitution may be ignored by The Emperor or with his permission, except or article #6 which shall be uphold by every soul in The Empire. INCLUDING The Emperor.
10 Everyone is a member of The Royal Armed Forces (RAF) and whenever someone of The RAF conquers any chunk of land, it will be absorbed into The Imperial Grounds.
11 Everybody shall respect our Culture, which includes Things like our National Anthem, our Flag and so on.
ll this will be found in The Declaration of Independence or in additional laws, founded or accepted by The Emperor.
12 Every soul is required to sleep at least 7 hours per week, that means a schizophrenic must sleep at least 14 hours per week!
13 When ye break the law, The Emperor will suck a punishment out of His Own Thumb considering article #9.
14 However no one knows why this is called a constitution, ye must accept this therm.
15 No one may hunt Penguins and Sheep's, for They are Holy in The Empire.
16 No living soul may call himself 'No one' or 'Nobody' or 'Leendert Lorenzo Antonio Reek' by punishment of renaming, taking in consideration article #13
17 No one except for Leendert Lorenzo Antonio Reek or the by him appointed successors may call himself The Emperor, with or without capitol letters.
18 Nothing is allowed to be food, except it is meant to be food which will be appointed by The Emperor.
19 Everyone is allowed to use his own form of the English, the Afrikaans, the Dutch and every other languages, except Qootärfloams which is Holy, or when no one could understand the meaning any more.
20 Everybody is allowed to apply to become a citizen of Qootärlænt.